Do you relate to me when it comes to laziness, consistency, and good habits?
Do you ever catch yourself every once in a while just postponing tasks, procrastinating to get them started, or not feeling like it? It can be work-related or just general life things. I know for me, I tend to get super excited when I start a project but when that excitement cools off, oh god... I have to fight myself to do the bare minimum sometimes.
Some call it laziness, but I began to think of it as activities that don't give me immediate satisfaction. They are a much smaller part of a big goal I want to get to but don't seem as important and don't necessarily spark motivation, so I always get that sense of "I can do it later".
There is another category I like to place some activities into, especially things I've never done before which is the "fear of failure" pile. Like many people from my generation, the fear of failure has been carved on us as almost unquestionable. This is one of my biggest irrational fears for sure and when I see it happen at work, it is almost magnified.
On the other hand, I am a person that learns by doing and by failing.
I was taught to be perfect all the time, or as much as I can. Those moments when I can't, though, should be witnessed by the least amount of people because, you know, making mistakes is bad, it takes time and it's not lucrative.
Between those two types of freezing mindsets, I just stand there thinking all sorts of thoughts to myself and that can linger for a little bit. I mentioned in this recent post that impostor syndrome is something that paralyzes me, but I think that sits within the "fear of failing" realm.
This whole scenario recently bothered me enough to make me elaborate on what I could do to make things easier. I no longer believe in the discipline at all costs and forcing myself to get things done. I have to learn to work with what I have and how I function. If I learn the best by going at it and making mistakes, how can I make that easier for myself? Here is what I came up with.
Therapy, whenever I can get back to it
Observing more how my mind and energy levels work (and judging less)
Preparing for myself in my high-energy spikes, for when I'm in my low-energy state
A slight but relevant tangent
I was watching some Youtube during my lunch breaks while preparing food and doing chores, as you do. It's been some time since I started binge-watching small business vlogs and art creation content geared toward small businesses. It was how I discovered an Australian channel called Mimimoo Illustration.
Mimi, the channel's owner, is an illustrator who posts about her business journey working for herself, growing her following and her income while staying true to her passions, her needs, and her free time. She said something that really resonated with me
Prepare yourself for your laziest and you'll have a higher chance of being consistent with your habits
I saw that as the final strategy I was looking for to make consistency seem more attainable and less daunting to me and that's how the last topic above came to be.
I'm all about discipline, consistency, and good habits, don't get me wrong, but sometimes that is just too hard, and "need" is not a good enough reason for me to actually do something I don't want to do.
So I created some systems for myself, and I'll give you examples I use to work on the blog:
I have my excellent, good, ok, and enough list of tasks I encourage myself to complete.
The "enough" tasks are simple and fast enough for me to be able to complete without thinking much about or dreading them. Anything up from there is more than enough, literally. In practice, this is the minimum I have to do to keep the blog up and running, even if it just means coming up with a draft title, checking my SEO, or giving images some alt texts. Same thing for Pinterest, sometimes the only thing I can bring myself to do is to post 3 pins and call it a day. At this bare minimum, I'm still showing up and working towards growing the blog.
I build up a queue of scheduled posts on my good days to account for the low-energy days I know I have
My minimum for the queue is always one week's worth of posts, which for me equals three. Any less than that, I don't feel like I'm caring for my future self and I don't consider it enough, so I try to bring myself to write a bit more. In this case, when I say low energy, I mean really low energy, like, working from bed and barely walking the dog kind of days. I also account for unexpected trips to my hometown, as I live somewhat away and mini trips to see the in-laws in another state, which happens once a month. I make sure I prepare myself to be able to dedicate time and attention to them.
I allow myself to miss even the "enough" tasks from time to time to remind myself that a little chaos and a need for rest are unpredictable
Trying to be perfect, at this point, runs in my blood. I can say discipline is a virtue for me, but now, more than ever, I'm trying to teach myself that that is in no way tied to my worth. Whether or not I can complete a task shouldn't define how worthy I am of meeting my needs and caring for myself. Easier said than done, of course.
I have to trust myself to know I prepared and accounted for these moments and that it is 100% ok to take and enjoy them.
Knowing myself enough to differentiate low energy from boredom
Again, much easier said than done. These two can look and feel very similar, I know, but knowing how to differentiate them creates an opportunity for me to know when to change gears and work on something I like more to refresh my perspective.
To better exemplify here, I think about other tasks I like doing and see how they make me feel. I'm the kind of person that gets excited to do something I like or am good at, so when that happens, I know I'm bored with the first task, but have some fire for something else. Otherwise, if I can't bring myself to do things I enjoy, I start to pay attention to energy toward other things too and evaluate from there.
If all else fails, I bribe myself into just getting it done and over with
Hey, sometimes we really need to get things done and over with. Maybe there is a deadline coming up, maybe I'm mad for not having the three posts ready like I'd promised myself and I'll be out of town soon. Not reaching a non-negotiable can actually act like fuel sometimes. It's not the best of reasons, but it can be the motivation needed when we are frustrated and on a time crunch.
Preparing at your best for your worst is one of the main self-care attitudes I believe we can have. It involves getting to know and accepting yourself on a deeper level, respecting boundaries, and working with what you have.
Also, I like to compensate for it by allowing myself a The Sims or Coral Island gameplay watch session while drinking a glorious cup of hot chocolate. Beauty and lifestyle youtube channels are equally welcomed.
So yeah, that was my take on discipline, laziness, good habits, consistency, and self-knowledge. Do you agree? How do you deal with it yourself?
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